A few tears means a happier baby
Listening to your baby cry is one of the hardest things there is. I have a really hard time listening to Caleb cry, especially when I don't know why he's crying. It's frustrating to feel like something is wrong, but he can't tell you what it is, so you're just left guessing.
Well, recently I've gotten better at deciphering between his different cries. He has one cry that means, "I'm hungry." and another one that means, "I'm HUNGRY!!!!". He has a cry that means, "I'm getting tired" and he has one that means, "I want someone to hold me." He has another one that means, " I need to burp", and yet another than means, "I need my diaper changed." Now granted, alot of these cries sound the same alot of the time, so I'm still left guessing sometimes, but if he's crying, I know it's one of these things. Thankfully he's not the type of baby who cries for no reason.
Up until a few days ago, I would do anything, and I do mean anything to keep him from crying. You don't feel like taking a nap?? OK, stay awake. You want me to hold you, even though I'm busy with something?? OK, no problem. While it's fine for me to want him to be happy, there's got to come a point when he doesn't get everything he wants, the second he wants it. Now if he's hungry, I feed him. If he needs his diaper changed, I change him. But at the same time, if he's tired, isn't it my responsibility to make sure he gets sleep? Sometimes he just doesn't realize what he needs.
So for the past several days, when I know that Caleb is tired and needs to take a nap, and I know that there is no reason for him to be crying other than the fact that he doesn't think he needs a nap, I let him cry. It's hard. I don't like it. But I've realized that even though it seems to take forever, he only cries for about 5 minutes and then he goes right to sleep. Isn't this better than letting him decide whether or not he takes a nap? I'm his mom and I know that it's important for him to get his sleep, whether he knows it or not.
Some people are completely against "crying it out", but I think that some babies, particularly ones who do not cry much to begin with, just need to let off some energy before they can sleep. Now, for those of you who are curious, I don't just toss him in bed and leave him to cry until he falls asleep. I stay right beside him the whole time, telling him that he's fine, and it's time for a nap and then he'll feel better. I might pat his back and give him his paci, but once I put him down, I do not pick him back up, unless I think he needs to burp, and then its a quick burp and right back down. My opinion might be different if it took 30 minutes of crying for him to go to sleep. I'm not sure I could do that, but for now, 5 minutes of crying, here and there, isn't so bad, especially when it's really for his own good.
And believe it or not, doing this has helped establish a routine better then anything else. Previously, his naps were very inconsistent because he was deciding when he slept. In other words, he was staying awake until he couldn't keep his eyes opened anymore and by the time he fell asleep it was almost time for him to eat again. So I was left to either wake and fed an unrested baby, or let him sleep longer and change his feeding schedule. Either way, our days were very inconsistent and he wasn't always sleeping or eating well. Now, he takes a nap when I know he needs one, and it has caused our days to look very similar. He's tired at about the same time every day. He's hungry at about the same time every day. What a relief to finally have some sort of routine back to our days. I'm more rested and happier and so is he.
So, at 7 weeks old, here is our daily routine:
5:30 - he wakes, diaper change, eat, and straight back to bed
8:30 - I typically have to wake him, diaper change, eat
9:00 - get dressed, go for a walk or, if it's too hot, play with mommy or sit in bouncy seat or swing
9:30ish - nap
11:30 - diaper change, eat
12:00 - playtime with daddy (who comes home for lunch)
12:30ish - nap
2:30 - diaper change, eat
3:00 - play with mommy, tummy time, swing or bouncy seat
4:00ish - nap
5:30 - diaper change, eat
6:00 - playtime with daddy (while I fix dinner)
7:00 - nap (this could be considered bedtime, but because we haven't done bath or jammies yet, I call it a nap)
8:30 - diaper change, eat
9:00 - bath, jammies
9:30 - bedtime
11:00 or 11:30 - eat ( he pretty much stays asleep for this feeding)
Well, recently I've gotten better at deciphering between his different cries. He has one cry that means, "I'm hungry." and another one that means, "I'm HUNGRY!!!!". He has a cry that means, "I'm getting tired" and he has one that means, "I want someone to hold me." He has another one that means, " I need to burp", and yet another than means, "I need my diaper changed." Now granted, alot of these cries sound the same alot of the time, so I'm still left guessing sometimes, but if he's crying, I know it's one of these things. Thankfully he's not the type of baby who cries for no reason.
Up until a few days ago, I would do anything, and I do mean anything to keep him from crying. You don't feel like taking a nap?? OK, stay awake. You want me to hold you, even though I'm busy with something?? OK, no problem. While it's fine for me to want him to be happy, there's got to come a point when he doesn't get everything he wants, the second he wants it. Now if he's hungry, I feed him. If he needs his diaper changed, I change him. But at the same time, if he's tired, isn't it my responsibility to make sure he gets sleep? Sometimes he just doesn't realize what he needs.
So for the past several days, when I know that Caleb is tired and needs to take a nap, and I know that there is no reason for him to be crying other than the fact that he doesn't think he needs a nap, I let him cry. It's hard. I don't like it. But I've realized that even though it seems to take forever, he only cries for about 5 minutes and then he goes right to sleep. Isn't this better than letting him decide whether or not he takes a nap? I'm his mom and I know that it's important for him to get his sleep, whether he knows it or not.
Some people are completely against "crying it out", but I think that some babies, particularly ones who do not cry much to begin with, just need to let off some energy before they can sleep. Now, for those of you who are curious, I don't just toss him in bed and leave him to cry until he falls asleep. I stay right beside him the whole time, telling him that he's fine, and it's time for a nap and then he'll feel better. I might pat his back and give him his paci, but once I put him down, I do not pick him back up, unless I think he needs to burp, and then its a quick burp and right back down. My opinion might be different if it took 30 minutes of crying for him to go to sleep. I'm not sure I could do that, but for now, 5 minutes of crying, here and there, isn't so bad, especially when it's really for his own good.
And believe it or not, doing this has helped establish a routine better then anything else. Previously, his naps were very inconsistent because he was deciding when he slept. In other words, he was staying awake until he couldn't keep his eyes opened anymore and by the time he fell asleep it was almost time for him to eat again. So I was left to either wake and fed an unrested baby, or let him sleep longer and change his feeding schedule. Either way, our days were very inconsistent and he wasn't always sleeping or eating well. Now, he takes a nap when I know he needs one, and it has caused our days to look very similar. He's tired at about the same time every day. He's hungry at about the same time every day. What a relief to finally have some sort of routine back to our days. I'm more rested and happier and so is he.
So, at 7 weeks old, here is our daily routine:
5:30 - he wakes, diaper change, eat, and straight back to bed
8:30 - I typically have to wake him, diaper change, eat
9:00 - get dressed, go for a walk or, if it's too hot, play with mommy or sit in bouncy seat or swing
9:30ish - nap
11:30 - diaper change, eat
12:00 - playtime with daddy (who comes home for lunch)
12:30ish - nap
2:30 - diaper change, eat
3:00 - play with mommy, tummy time, swing or bouncy seat
4:00ish - nap
5:30 - diaper change, eat
6:00 - playtime with daddy (while I fix dinner)
7:00 - nap (this could be considered bedtime, but because we haven't done bath or jammies yet, I call it a nap)
8:30 - diaper change, eat
9:00 - bath, jammies
9:30 - bedtime
11:00 or 11:30 - eat ( he pretty much stays asleep for this feeding)
Labels: little man, parenting
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